Home 6 Yours Footbally 6 Dear Mourinho, Slap Somebody

Dear Mourinho, Slap Somebody

Dear Mourinho,

I am writing you from my bed, just after predicting your team won’t score in the Manchester derby (aptly speaking, the MouPep Clasico).

It’s not a bad time to be ProPep, and certainly not the best time to be AntiJose. And that’s why I’m sending you a letter.

You have to reinvent the mind games and give us some Mourinho Moments!

Pep has a squad that could do you that 5-0 thing, he did you in El Clasico. You’ve gat to pull some sideline stunts. Don’t let Pep take all the shine. He’s got the pitch, you’ve gat to claim the touchline.

The world expects a showdown. Give us something. Do a Conte, do a Simone, whatever you do, add that touch of arrogance and baddo only you can do.

Let the British press know who invented the pre-match, live and
post-match mind games. Give us a masterclass performance, teach Wenger how to loose a match and still steal the show.

Whatever you do, don’t make your face like a loosing Conte. Other few dont’s; don’t kick the water bottle, don’t step in the pitch to poke City’s player, don’t curse at the Ref, don’t throw your pen at Pep… Don’t do any of these else it’s the officiating guy that will steal the show.

He will kick your butt to the stands, out of sight. And what good will this do me? It will do no one good. We want to see a balanced game.

In this situation, a balance game is Man City winning the match and Mourinho winning off pitch. There’s nothing fairer than this.

Now…if by any chance you win the match, against my prediction. By all means slap somebody!

Yours Footbally,
Ediale

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About Ediale Kingsley

Ediale Kingsley is the Founding Editor of Jersey Number Twelve and Head of the Trends & Sports desk at National Daily Newspaper. He thinks he is polygamous, married to three wives; Football, Laptop and Internet. When not writing, he is writing or prepping to write. These days he is everywhere talking, filming and showing-up football and films. This National Daily trained journalist went to school to be a graduate in accounting.

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